Which father is better for the children?

Father A:



Sees the children every day, by choice. Is involved volunteering at school, invovled in extracurriculars, even set up a soccer club when there wasnt one at the school for the kids to join and coaches it. Taught the kids how to ride thier bikes. Takes care of them when they are sick etc, congratulates and celebrates report cards and other important things, attend all school activities



Father B:



Sees the kids every second weekend by choice, makes no phone calls in between. Didnt bother attending a volunteer night to learn about volunteering at the school, wants to attend parent teacher night only. Said the kids can only attend extracurriculars if its not on his time, he wont take them and wont attend them unless they are in the vicinity of his house (the kids would have to travel for an hour to attend). Just after the kids learned how to ride thier bikes, he refused to take them riding because one had a flat tire so he left it that way instead of fixing it. Calls the mother when they are sick to take care of it and then never calls to find out how the child is doing afterwards. When given a report card never congratulates the child. And when you say to teh child, he must have been so proud of you! the child says, no he didnt say nothing.





































Father A is a stepfather and Father B is the bio father, does that change your opinion on who is better for the kids?







Bio dad also said that stepdad should be paying for the kids and be financially responsible for him so he didnt have to pay so much child support, which he pays minimum of.











Now, me and father A, as a couple, are thinking of relocating to go to school and increase our income....is it really a detriment for the children to move from father B and turn four days a month into four weeks in summer, one week at Christmas and one week at Spring Break?




Which father is better for the children?
We both know Father A is the more responsible and caring father, but as a single mom I understand this can be frustrating. You need to do what is best for your children. If your husband is willing to be a full time father to your children, and it sounds like he is, it could be just what your kids need. I know it is difficult but I am sure you will make the best decision. Good luck!
Which father is better for the children?
Like as if you don't know the answer or rather that your mind is already made up.
Nope. Take father A and your kids and relocate. Father B is not a father, he's a sperm donor. Why don't you suggest he terminate his parental rights, and your husband can adopt them? Since he is supposed to be financially responsible for them. See how that floats his boat.
Something tells me that there is more to this story, there always is...



Who is better or worse is not up for debate, nor is a court order. If you turn this into a contest you will be the loser, the kids will never forgive you. Just clam up, raise the kids and let them make up their own minds.



Unfortunately many people turn the raising of children into a big battle of egos. Don't fall into that trap.
sounds like the stepdad is the dad.



at least the bio-dad isn't in jail like my sister's ex-husband. and she still thinks he deserves to see the kids (when he's not in jail or using drugs on the street) so she refuses to leave the town they are in.



good for you for wanting to get away for a better life for yourself and kids.
oh plz. if you want to move, then do it. the kids will be fine.
It is a detriment to move the kids away from their biological parent UNLESS the biological parent says it is ok. You might be able to do so legally, and maybe the bio dad isn't all that you wish he was, but if he wants to be around, usually it is better for the kids if he is around. If he's actually a bad influence or treats them poorly, that changes it.
All I want to say is Step-dad is the definition of what a real father is supposed to be. You have to ask yourself are the kids happy when they go to their bio dad's house.
It's not really about which dad is %26quot;better%26quot;. The biodad is always going to be the biodad, no matter how many volunteer hours the stepdad puts in. Looking for that kind of distinction isn't fair to your children. It's not really relevant either. You have to do what's best for your family. If that means you have to move to another area to get a better job, that's what it means.
I can totally relate to your situation. Keep the focus and primary goal on the %26quot;best interest of the children%26quot; and you can't go wrong.



The bio dad's feelings/convenience (and yours %26amp; stepdad's for that matter) are non-issues. It's what is overall best for the kids that matters. Make sure you can make a case for that in court if it comes to it, and then proceed with your plans. Do not allow their dad to shame or bully you into doing what he wants regardless of what you know is right.




I say you do what's best for your children %26amp; stepdad or not he's the one taking care of them %26amp; it sounds like bio dad won't even care if you move.
The answer seems obvious and you seem bitter. What is the whole story here?
The step dad sounds like a great person n the really bio dad is awful! But that is what you think, maybe you should sit down with the kids n ask them if they want to move tell them reason you want to n listen to what they think about moving too!
I would talk to father b and tell him your concerns as a mother.Tell him that father a is doing a better job of taking care of the children and if he wants for him to take responsibility then he won't have rights to see the children.Sounds like he really doesn't care much about the children.Tell him that you are planing to move and maybe he would consider being a better father for the children.I HOPE THIS HELPED.
father A wich should be a given

he treats them better then their own father the father doesnt deserve to be around them that much duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
you are not a wicked witch and he is not an angel, but i feel its wrong to move his kids far away from him!!!! I would never do that to my kids dad, with out his blessing.



Imagine for a moment, he had custody of your kids, and didnt get to see them everyday, and then he wanted to make it so you can only see them at those times. Think about that.

For a father not always with their kids its hard, they miss them, and just cause he doesnt call them or parent them the way he does, doesnt make him wong or less worthy of bein in thier lives.



A question for you, if he wanted to see them everyday, is it really possible? Do you end up in arguments when he calls? If you are, men avoid that!



BIg point too, you say the kids dont like to go to his house, and id have to say. you have put him down alot and dont be mistaken to think your kids dont hear the stuff you say to people and to your partner about him , and its likly they dont want to upset you.
Father B OK girl father A can be just a paycheck with legs..
Its sounds like your children are old enough to kinda understand what is going on so talk to them. Ask them how they would feel about moving to a new school, making new friends, being away from bio dad and everything. Don't give your opinion when talking to them just the facts and see how they feel. Let them know that you want what is best for them and you won't be mad with what they decide.
Father A, the step parent steps up for the kids and the bio father doesn't. It's shameful %26amp; sad. Father B does not deserve a kid. Good luck to you %26amp; keep the step daddy. When the children are older, the father will more %26amp; likely blame you for every thing. By then the kids would have seen their father for who he really is. They will eliminate that man out of their life and the one dad that raised them will be the one person they will be close to as he has shown that he loves them and they can trust him through his actions.



Be happy you have the Dad by your side,

GOOD LUCK!!
In my opinion when faced with a question like this, i say look at the children

children

children

children

they are the most important factor in this situation

what do they want?

do they feel attached to their bio father, would it be a big pressure on them to move away from him even though he may not be the best carer for them?

i dont know the age of your kids but please sit down and have an adult conversation with them

adults tend to get caught up in the conflicts, ignoring the most important factor

who is getting affected most?....the children



good luck with everything!